Thursday, January 31, 2008


Sitting home and getting to watch many of the twenty-four news networks you get to realize how funny politics really is. The sad thing is how many lives depend out the outcome of what goes on with all of this. These people spend time knocking each other and promising things and assuring the next thing. Which one is going to end the war and who says the troops may be there for the next hundred years? One is going to end poverty, the next one is going to give universal health care and next one will balance the budget. Some may raise taxes; some lower, some even do away with taxes, and some might just flatten them and make them fairer! They say “we’ll educate everyone, create millions of new jobs, secure boarders, build walls, open up the boarders, give amnesty, bring down gas prices, reduce green house emissions, cure all diseases, protect life, protect choice, protect choice of life”. WHEW! If we could take a little of this one, a little of the next one and some of the other one, mix them all together and maybe then just maybe, wow we would have some candidate! Who knows?

The truth is (in my limited opinion), I have followed politics for some time (especially presidential) and in all honesty I find throughout the years (with some exceptions), and most of the people who run are sincere. I think they mean well and have some true honest convictions. Some do flip-flop and seem to say what is popular at the moment. I feel they say a lot, then when they get to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. and they are sitting in that Oval Office they find things are not as easy as they might have thought and the job is a lot more involved. That is why so many of them get white hair by the time they leave office. We as Americans can be funny too. We will put a democrat President in the White House and then we give them a republican Congress or visa-a-versa, so they wind up in grind lock for at least two years.

Bureaucracy, oh do not let me even get started. The other day I needed to call Medicare and I needed to speak to a human being. First after pressing eight different buttons, the recording tells me there will be a 12-minute wait to talk to a human being. Okay, a 12-minute wait this is the United States of America government business office telling me this, so I wait maybe 12, maybe 6, maybe 15 minutes, eventually a person gets on. I explain the situation and he tells me he needs to check something out, "to please hold on". I do. One minute leads into three minutes into 6 minutes, ten, and fifteen until a recording tells me that I am on hold to long thank you and proceeds to disconnect me. Therefore, we start all over again!

I was ready to eat a horse! In four hours, I basically, got nothing accomplished with all my calls. My instinct was to eat and eat a lot. I was angry, frustrated and my energy levels were down. I had to fight my old behavior patterns and ways of handling these feelings and for that day, I was successful! To quote Martha “that was a good thing”.

Yet it was not just a fight and I did not just sit there and bite my finger, hold on to my chair and just wait and hope until the feeling to binge passed. No! It did not work that way. I had to change my ways, I had to do things differently. The ways of my past do not work in my current lifestyle. Some one once said the sign of insanity is to do the same thing over and over the same way again and again. No, I found more constructive things to do. I spoke to people, I wrote, I even did a little exercise (for me).

We really need to try to do things differently. If it did not work for us in the past, why keep doing it the same old, same old, thing in the same old way. Sometimes we need to really change and not just talk about change and throw the word around meaninglessly. It is nice to talk change, yet we need to be doers, make change, especially change in our personal lives. This is what is really going to make a difference and count towards a quality of life.

Good luck to you in your political choices but more important bless you in your personal journey to make the changes that count.

Have a great day!


Tuesday, January 15, 2008

A Little Less Sunlight Shines Today ...

I am sad today! I am hurting, I am burning inside and my heart is screaming in pain. God has decided it is not quite the time for me to become a grandpa again. It is times like this when I find my faith being tested and I know I must turn to God even more, yet it is difficult. I know he understands it a lot better than I do. However, what hurts the most is not the loss of the opportunity of being a grandpa to another little baby right now. No, I have my grandson and that is wonderful enough and if God says that is it, well then that is okay. What hurts the most is that I have two children (my daughter-in-law and son) who are hurting and I cannot do anything to make that pain go away.

I know, I as a parent, I want for my kids not to hurt. I want to protect them. I know it is not a reasonable thing to say, I know it is part of growing up, I know they are adults and I hear all the arguments and voices telling me all the logical things but I still wish there was more that I could do for them, than just sit here. Sit here and love them, grieve with them, support them and try to find the right words (which I never seem to do).

I know time will heal, and with the help of our Lord a year or so from now there might be a little baby sitting here and today although will never be forgotten, the pain might be filed under “Past Pains”, but all that doesn’t help today or make it feel any better.

I want to take a moment to address all you beautiful, wonderful mothers out there. You are “vessels of miracles”, and you go through so much. Thank you and God bless you all.

As for my Nancy (my daughter-in-law, who I do not even think reads my blog), Nancy I love you honey and it will be okay and God, I am asking you, take care of her through this difficult time. Thank you.

Thank you everyone for your time and ...

Love to all of you … born and unborn

Thursday, January 3, 2008

No Resolutions ... at least not the same old, same old!

How could I even dare to attempt to make a New Years resolution? What would I say? How about, “I will go on a diet this year and lose weight”. Emmm, how original, I never said that one before! In a pig’s eye I didn’t. I can not begin to share with you how many times, how many years, how many resolutions started out, just like that one, “I will go on a diet …”! Not doing it this year, I will not set myself up, just to fail. In the past I would make that same old commitment to myself and when I would find myself in trouble, eating out of control, it would be just another excuse for me to eat some more. Why not? I failed at my resolution once again, munch, munch, munch, etc.

Not this year! 2007 has been a good year, a great year for me, I am in a better place both mentally and physically than I was 300 days ago and certainly 600 plus days ago. It has been a losing year for me (weight wise). This I have not been able to say for many years. I am more mobile than a year ago, I am home with my family and the past six months I have gotten the opportunity of a lifetime (one I never thought I would ever see). I have gotten to experience, interact, play and love my grandson, more than I could have ever imagined. What a blessing this has been!

Now for 2008 do I have resolutions, goals etc? Sure I do. I resolve not to be such a nag to my sweet wife. She is not responsible for me not being able to do the things I would like to be doing. She is, has been and always will be an angel to me. She is my soul mate and has put up with things that no human being (in my opinion) could do. She is a super gal, so I resolve to try to make her life a little easier (as far as I can do). I also resolve not to be so “OCD”. I don’t know when it happened and I am not even sure if I officially am but as I get older, I seem to become more like Jack Nicholson in “As Good As It Gets”. I need things done in certain ways; things have to be just so, it drives me crazy and the people around me, are not so thrilled with this either. So I will try not to be so … so, well you know. To be honest I am not to sure even these two resolutions are working out and it is only the 3rd of January.

Yet I will try to work on those things. As far as food and dieting go, no resolutions, not at all! It is about a way of life and what is better for me. I know it is better for me to eat sensibly and to move as much as I can and if by chance January 3rd 2009 I happen to weigh less than I do today, well then that is a good thing.

To all my dear friends, let’s stick together, remember it is a “weigh of life”, and also keep in mind “it’s not to late for 2008”.

Happy and Healthy New Year

Love ya