Just another day. You know those days where there is no “Pomp and Circumstance”, no parties going on, no company coming over, no events, no plans ….just another day. These for many of us are the majority of days and very often the days that for me in the past were the hardest to deal with (especially when it came to my eating problems). Today is just another day, how easy that can be stated and how untrue it really is.
Just another day, who am I kidding, it is “just another day”, a day that I have awoke, that I get a chance to enjoy a sunrise. A bird sings in my yard and I hear it. I open the door and fresh air blows gently over my face. Just another day to watch a TV show, or to smile, or get to enjoy my grandson. Another day to be able to love and be loved by my wife, son, family and friends. Another day to be a player in this game we call life! How thankful I am to be this player!
Let us not forget what this day really is (the day I am writing this blog). This is a day no American, no world citizen will ever forget, today is September 11th 2008 “911”. Is it “just another day”, to over 3,000 families and loved ones, of those poor innocent people who perished so needlessly, so innocently, so tragically. I spent part of my day watching the reading of those poor victims’ names and as they read, those names I could not help notice how many were in there twenties and thirties. Having a thirty-year-old son, I could not imagine the pain, the horror of it all. All I can say is God bless theses special souls and their loved ones left behind.
If I think about it and maybe not on such a large scale (as 911) but what might be “just another day” for me and you, in someone else’s life it is a very important date. There are no days that are, “just another day”.
I know I needed to look at every day as an important day for me in order to make important changes in my life. To make healthy changes. If it were “just another day” then I would eat whatever I wanted today and then tomorrow on an “important day” I would do the right thing. Wrong! I am just as important today as I am on Christmas Day, Fourth of July, tomorrow or the next day! I am important and so is every day that I am alive.
We need to appreciate this day and everyday and make every day count …for us! We have to do the right things for ourselves just as much today as we should have done yesterday and certainly will do tomorrow.
Not everyday will there be an obvious “parade” but if you look very hard and listen real well you will hear the drums, you will see the floats and enjoy the clowns. You make those days special, even if it is just by doing something nice for someone ….even like yourself.
You wake up; you are ahead of the game and what a game it will be. Let us face it, you can look at a day and deal with a day in a two ways.
One outlook --- “oh man, another day, I don’t feel well, I am alone, I am overweight, I have no money, I can’t eat right, da da da da da”. Another outlook could be “wow, what a great day (even a cloudy, rainy day has beauty), I am alive, I get a chance to make healthy choices, I am going to make myself happy in some way today, I am a lucky person”!
Therefore my friends I know what is working for me and having a positive outlook about my life (even at the low moments), looking for that silver lining, appreciating the journey, taking one step at a time, looking at that glass as so “half full” has helped me lose over 300 pounds in three years. What is even more important than the numbers is the inner feeling of peace. I do not want you or myself to think that I am totally relaxed, I know that I am an addict (food) and I will always be an addict. Yet my positive outlook and attitude, my dealing with each battle as it arises, has helped me now, in the moment and making my life work. So far for three years, thank God!
So if you are one of those who have a little difficulty looking on the bright side, give yourself a chance, begin to love yourself, see that glass as half full. You will begin to realize that there is reason for joy in almost all times of living itself.
Those of my friends that see that silver lining, well that is great! A little suggestion (if you do not already do so) share a smile with someone (especially one who may find it difficult to see that glass as half full) I promise the rewards will be great.
Bless you all; bless all the families and victims of 911
To all my friends have a great rest of this wonderful day and a special tomorrow …
Love
Mike
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55 comments:
I was reading this blog today and listening to music and anyone who knows me knows music is a very big part of my life and allows me to express myself through it.......
You speak of hope and going on and looking inside yourself and the funny thing the song i was listening to said so much about looking inside yourself because there is that HERO inside of yourself...and it made me really stop and think that yes we have so many heroes in the world but when do we stop and think about the main hero in our life...and that is OURSELVES.....we are heroes as we are still here today fighting a never ending battle and making it through the day and having tomorrow...so i thought i would post the words to the song as they had so much meaning ......... Huggs and love you Mike and thank you for allowing me to see the hero in you and more importantly to seeing the hero in myself...
HERO
There's a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you are
There's an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away
[Chorus:]
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
It's a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear
[Chorus]
Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone
Tear them away
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way
Love you Carol
Dear Mike
You have once again touched my heart and mad a difference in my heart.
Thank you for helping me realize that today is important too!
Every day is important and I am glad you have brought that to my attention. By the way Mike I ate very healthy so far today.
Dorine L. MI
What a beautiful song!
I look forward to reading your journal.it is almost a happy point when I see you have posted a new entry.
Glad to seeing you still trucking along.
Mike if your ever in need of something to do here is a little about me......
lacyokey.googlepages.com
Dear Lacy
I went to that great page, wow how interesting and exciting. I know someone so famous and a strong one! You seem to have a wonderful family and two great looking and happy children. I am also an animal lover and those puppies are adorable.
Thanks for being a loyal contributor to the blog we enjoy you input ...it means a lot to all of us.
Lacy good luck to you stay healthy and strong
Love
Mike
Hi Dorine
Sometimes we never realize exactly where or when we will finally "Get It"! It mat be from a blog page, or walking down a block in the neighborhood. It might be in church or a mall or even in your own living room. The thing is we must keep searching, keep open, keep trying, I believe eventually it will "Click", we will "Get It".
Then with a lot of hard work and a lot of positive reinforcement, you, myself and all of our friends can and will "Make It"! We have to...because "We Are Worth It"!!
Dorine, good luck and I am in your corner, keep in touch
Love
Mike
Sweet Carol
My songstress,
You always did like your music! I know for me there are songs that touch me and have different meanings to me in one way or another.
Truth being songs like poetry are beautiful but they are words and often some one Else's words. Don't get me wrong that is good and if it motivates you just realize that the power that actually makes you make the move the action is not in the words of a song, poem, or even my blog.
The power is within yourself and that is where you have to look for it and don't look to hard because trust me it is there...inside of all of us!
We sometimes need to just do it! Believe in it, believe in our self. Be patient, loving, compassionate...to others but mostly to ourselves.
You know that and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me the space to share this with you and others.
I am also grateful for your openness. I know others who come to the blog enjoy your honesty and like your input.
Carol publicly and personally I wish all the best to you and I am here for you
Love
Mike
Thanks again Mike for a great topic on your blog!
My brain is flooded with just so many things after reading this! My first reaction is how amazed I am at the battles that went on for years between my body, mind and spirit! Each day they'd battle it out and I would treat the winner with a favorite food trying to convince myself "I earned or deserved it". You see, no matter what the battle was about, I was going to over indulge in something... If the body was feeling exhausted I'd have something with extra sugar claiming it will give it a boost... If the mind was thinking I had to eat healthier and less I'd eat a portion of something fatty with a small side of something healthy and claim that it was good for me because I didn't eat bread with it... If my spirit was up or down I'd find excuses to feed that too... And those were all ordinary days for me... When what we call a "special day" arrived I'd over indulge with the excuse that it's a special day and I don't get to do this often... HA! What a deception to myself! Point being, depending on how I felt about myself, life and circumstances all determined as to what I was going to over indulge in, claiming in any of those circumstances that it was all "deserving" of me to have! Well of course that was all BS and me just denying the true facts that I was committing a slow suicide and with a smile on my face for how well I was doing it... I just didn't care what happened to me... I always found it so easy to be good to others and do good things for others, but not for myself... But the truth is, I was NOT "deserving" of any of that and I took the word "deserve" well out of context to suit my own purpose... Well I've finally learned how to say the word right and actually use it and live it in the context it is meant for! And I see how each day is not ever like any other, especially when it comes to treating myself TRULY good... The 10th of this month was the 1st anniversary of my Daddy's passing... I loved my Daddy so much and miss him more than I care to mention... the reason I bring this up is that I was a wreck all day! As the day progressed I got worse and worse til FINALLY I said to myself, "Get out of this house before I do something stupid like dive into a bucket of ANYTHING!" Sooooo... I went up to the corner and got a manicure, pedicure, massage, eyebrow waxing, etc. Before you know it... I was feeling great and looking even better and 3 hours had passed, a crucial 3 hours that had I stayed home and wallowed in my sorrow would have certainly led me to NOT be good to myself! Jokingly I say that if I had wallowed in my sorrow and did something bad for me and to me, and then I happen to die right after I would have left this earth miserably with the last thought people having that I stuffed my face out of sadness... but had I died after the manicure, pedicure, etc... at least people's last thoughts would be It's a shame but HEY she looked GREAT and was HAPPY! HAHA! If this was a few years ago I would not be able to say this... But now I celebrate each day with doing something special for myself, whether it be drinking extra water and doing my workout or playing an extra game with my son, planting something... Whatever it is, it's something constructive and healthy that will leave me feeling proud and with a smile... And I do it because I DO DESERVE IT! I only have today to make it better then yesterday and if I wait until tomorrow I may not get the chance... So yeah... I see the glass is half full now and share my smiles every chance I get with anyone and everyone who's willing and not willing because I want so much for everyone to feel as good as I do!
God Bless you Mike for making this a place to help fill our glasses further!
Peace, love & light... Diana
Well, this is exciting to find your blog! I was just watching the Brookhaven show, and I came over to google you and see if there was an update anywhere on the internet. What a pleasant surprise to find your blog. What an inspiration it is, and I've just read the last few posts. God be with you Michael! Many hugs to you and Madeline!
Dear Michael
I too just saw you on the Brookhaven Show. I am thrilled to read your blog. I am 460 pounds and just reading your blog as given me the inspiration to try one more time.
If I may I would love to return often to this site.
Thank you so much
Larry WV
It is amazing how many people follow and come together on your blog Micheal.It shows what an inspiration you really are!Thank you for the kind comments on my page.
Again you hit me no special day but in your special way you make me realize how special it is eacj day that my eyes open and i breathe. I hope to make each day special by getting myself healthier.
thanks chubby
Dear Michael
I am so inspired but your strength. I know that I am going to do better just by connecting with you, your blog and the wonderful people who come to this page. I appreciate any help, I am a single mom 34 years old 100 pounds overweight and I live only for my two kids 7 & 9 years old.
After reading some of your notes Mike I realize I need to live also for myself.
I am trying!
God bless you Mike and please take care of yourself, we need you.
Love all you do
Olivia MO
Michael
Saw You last night on TV you were such an example for us to follow. Then I found this website and I was thrilled to see how you are and your outlook is phenomenal. I look up to you and although I do not have as much as you to lose I will use you as my example. More important than the weight you seem to have changed your life views.
Also are you still mad at Richard, I hope not he appears to be such a nice guy.
Well thanks for this page
Vera Ga
This is a great blog page and Mike you are truly a hero to many of us.
Hi Mike
I was in a desperate place, I am not saying that I am totally safe but the few things I have read on your blog has me thinking, a lot.
I am proud of where you are and honored to be able to share with you. You truly are an inspiration to me and I am sure many. If I had three wishes one of them would be to meet with you and listen to more of what you have to say.
Well I will keep wishing and visiting your blog and getting through my demons.
Laura T.
I am so happy to have found this blog and wish Michael all the best. To those who have said they are desperate, I so understand that pain. I was at 280 pounds and my doctor said a bypass was my last hope. Without it, I have managed to get down to around 200 (still have 70 more to go) but each day is a struggle to make the right choices. I still see food as my enemy and not my friend.
Hi
This is such a positive blog page. I also enjoy what some of the comments from others are. I relate to this person who lost 70 pounds and food is their enemy. I understand it, but I am so unhappy with food as my enemy.
Mike do you have any words for me.
Bea, Co.
Dear Michael
I have been debating whether to write or not, I usually do not post on the Internet. Yet your story, and the words I read that you write are so compulsive that I had to write you. I have been inspired by you and you have made me want to make changes. I will continue to visit this web site and read your inspiration. Keep going Mike you mean so much to me and I am sure others.
Thank you for the spark
Theresa NY
Dear Mike
I am glad I found this blog site and better still that I found you in good health.
Great Blog great contributions by you and others. I will be back.
Derrick
Michael
You have helped me. I read your blog and believe in what you say. I have been doing k.i.s.t and lost 44 pounds 50 more to go.
Thanks
T
Michael
I met you and your wife many years ago at St. Lukes, at that time you were very sick. Her dedication to you was unreal. She was by your side 24/7. I came to meet you and although you were very sick you still had a smile for me and that was so imortant. I am thrilled to see and read your are doing well. You are blessed and a real inspiration, my regards to your wife Madelaine and thanks for that smile.
Jean NY
Michael
This is an interesting web site and you have touched me in a way that has made me want to do well for myself. I like what you have to say. I have 70 pounds to lose and I will let you know how I am doing.
Will write soon but will visit often.
Elizabeth WI
Hi Sweet Diana
What is interesting, is how you say the daily battle you went through. True you might not of handled it right (in the most healthiest) way at the time. Yet the interesting thing is that you (and most of us) do survive, we are survivors. We hang on and if we do not give up, then eventually we will find the right formula that works for each one of us.
You truly seem to have begun to find your right formula (but you had such a great foundation). You are a fighter! You always had your sense of humor, you always knew how to give love (maybe not to yourself at that time) but now you are getting around to you!
Diana you are one of the most kindest and loving people I know.
It is your time now and you realize it! You are now a full player in your game (of life).
Good luck and have a great journey.
I appreciate your kind words and support. I enjoy when you post on the blog as do many others. I hope you continue to be a regular.
Keep well and give my love to you know who!
Love
Mike
Dear Barb
Well thank you from the bottom of my heart and from my wife Madelaine also. I am glad you took the moment to look for me and am even happier you enjoyed the Blog postings. I hope you continue to come back from time to time and even post also.
It inspires me to have the support of others also. I hope that all is well in your life and most important that you keep a positive outlook.
I feel that life has it's ups and downs, good times and rough ones but the important thing is how we journey through! To be as positive and with the best outlook as possible. Always realizing that there is good things, great things in our lives.
Well Barb, you have a great day and please keep in touch!
Love and respect
Mike
Hi Larry
First let me tell you that you are welcome, more than welcome to visit this site anytime you want. I also hope you find that you would like to post your comments from time to time. It will be my pleasure and I am sure your contributions will help others too.
Larry just a personal note, remember that 460 is just a number, a number that can change. You have the power to change that number. Making it go higher is physically easier to do but then pays a toll on our life. Physically, medically and emotionally our life is in turmoil. yet to get that number to come down, takes energy, determination, and a lot of self-love. Then those numbers go down. Your health gets better, the quality of your life gets even better!
Larry you can and will make the right choices to do the right things. You do not need me to tell you but get the right medical attention on your journey and keep in touch.
Good luck to you
Respect and love
Mike
Dear Lacy
I was really impressed with your web site and even more with you and your accomplishments. Your outlook and positive attitude came through to me and that was an inspiration. I suggest you post your website URL address in your next comment. (I wouldn't do that without your permission).
Well Lacy thanks for your friendship
Love
Mike
Dear Chubby
Glad to be a help! Each day is a gift in itself and if we get the opportunity to be part of that day then we are really lucky!
I want to say to you Chubby I hope you do what you need to do to make yourself healthier each day in a better way. No matter what anyone around you may think or think you should do. It is what you think that is the most important. Only you know how you really feel.
Although I would bet that your loved ones, especially those closest to you, would support you in whatever it takes to get you on the road to good health. I would bet that!
Well Chubby it is always a pleasure to hear from you and I hope you continue to post, let us know how you are doing ...health wise especially.
Be well
Love
Mike
Dear Olivia,
I am lucky with the beautiful people that come to the blog and choose to leave a comment.
As for you my dear Olivia, what can I say..... I can say that you are only 34 and I wish I reached out at 34. Asking is half the battle. Olivia, you have the basics, yourself, your desire and two adorable kids help too. 100 pounds is not the end of the world. you know that is 2 pounds a week. If it took a year and half ...Wow, what is the big deal. Just think of what that number could be a year and half from now if you do nothing!
Olivia, you love your kids I know that now love yourself enough to continue along this quest. it is not easy but not impossible.
Go for it Olivia you can do it!
Keep in touch
Love
Mike
Dear Vera
First, thank you for your kind words. I also want to tell you, that you may not have has much weight as I have to lose but your choices today, your battles and mine are the same. When you break it down to each day, each meal we both have the same job...taking care of ourselves.
Now as for Richard, I love Richard, have loved him since basically Jan. 21st 1988. Not a day goes by that I do not thank God for that man and his life!
Let me try to explain what happened that day.
Now I am not a movie star but with my limited experience of the media, they do have an art of editing things to kind of bend the way it looks more sensational than it actually is.
When Richard, that day, on camera did question my wife, this is what I felt. I am very protective of my wife. I know it hurts her when people say those kind of things because the truth is over the 33 years that we have been together she has tried everything from tender love to tough love to get me to stop eating.
The only thing she will not do is leave me (thank God for that).
She is the one earthly human being that is solely and clearly the major reason for me being alive today (other than myself), don't get me wrong I have a great support team of doctors and professional but without Madelaine I would not be here today.
The sad truth is I am an addict and no one can stop me when I do not want to be stopped.
Therefore when Richard asked her those questions, I knew she was hurting and if it were anyone else I would have jumped in and defended her and I would have responded.
Yet it was Richard and the cameras were there and ta, ta, ta, ta.
Therefore, when they asked me later on camera what I was thinking etc. I said I was mad, at myself, for not reacting.
Our loved ones who care for us, take care of us should not be blamed for our self destructive behavior. What are they guilty of loving us!
No I was angry at myself and I hurt for my sweet wife.
A woman who is just guilty of loving me and loving me through thick and thin!
As for Richard, I am not, and was not mad at Richard. I talk to him regularly and just spoke with him the other day and it has been twenty years and he has never deserted me.
Vera he not only seems to be a nice man he is a great human being!
Thanks for writing, hope to hear from you again
Love
Mike
Dear Sweet Laura
Let me let you in on a little secret, "I do not think any of us are ever in a completely safe place"! We have to be cautious as much as possible and enjoy our journey but we must be aware of our internal struggle.
Laura I am so glad that you find the blog enjoyable and I would look forward to one of those three wishes come true. It would be my pleasure to meet you...who know what the future holds. Keep in touch and good luck Laura
Love
Mike
My dear Anonymous friend,
Good luck to you. You are doing a great job so far. You have made that choice not to get the surgery, I am sure that must have been a difficult, especially when your doctor wanted you to get it. I am rooting for you and I know you will get to your healthy weight. I understand when you say "you see food as your enemy" I too at onetime saw it that way. The truth is we are or can be our worse enemy. Food is a good thing, we need it to survive, it is just our misuse of it that harms us. So don't be afraid of food, respect it for what it is. Something to keep us alive. Something that when used correctly promotes our good health.
So my friend good luck to you and make up with food ....but do not become to friendly with it. Don't hang out with it all day!
Love
Mike
Hi Bea
Well if you read what I wrote to our friend just before this comment.
We can not be happy with food as an enemy. We have to learn to live with food and use it to our best outcome. When we look at it as an enemy we either, hate it so much we stay away from it completely (you know what that will lead to, not a very good ending)or we get so frustrated we just can not concentrate on being positive enough to do the healthy things for ourselves.
So Bea, accept food for what it is, just a substance to help keep us alive. It should not make us happy or unhappy that is not its function. Happiness is not part of the food equation... although we often try to include food in our happiness equation!
Good luck Bea, relax and be happy
Love
Mike
Dear Theresa,
Thank you, thank you. Please keep coming back to the web site (blog). It is our pleasure to have you part of the blog family.
In response to you Theresa, my every intention is to continue moving forward, I love the freedom, I love being able to play again with my wife and being active in the family. I enjoy the world and just want to be out there.
Thank you for posting
Love
Mike
Dear Derrick
I too am glad you found me in good health....! I am happy you enjoy the blog and it is people like yourself that make it successful. Please continue to be a regular visitor!
Thanks
Mike
Dear T
Nice name! Only kidding. Great job on moving those numbers in the right direction, keep up the great work!
Love
M
Dear Jean
That is very nice of you to remember and share those thoughts with the rest of us.
There have been quite a few times when my hospital stays (I have had many over twenty years) have been critical ones. Yes, my wife Madelaine has been there 24/7 most of the time holding my hand, giving me a cold compress, overseeing and making sure I was getting the proper care (although at ST. Lukes...they are the best). She is phenomenal and I am too lucky!
In all due respect there were a few times when my wife could not be there for one reason or another and in the beginning (early years) my dad relieved her, and later on my son was at my side. I am a blessed man.
It takes a village to raise a Michael.
Well Jean I hope you are doing well, email me at michaelhebrank@yahoo.com we can talk more. In the meantime I send out to you a big smile right now to you.
I pray you are doing well!
Love
Mike
Dear Elizabeth
Good luck and keep me up to date with your journey. I am so in your corner. I look forward to your visits and your comments.
I know you will make it, Never Give Up Elizabeth you are a winner already!
Love
Mike
Michael,
Watching "Inside Brookhaven" I could in your eyes see that you were mortified by being the "circus sideshow" you think you have become. But what you need to understand is that there are those out there who look at you and have unkind thoughts... but those people have unkind thoughts toward many different kinds of human beings....obese, handicapped, minorities, poor, homeless, mentally ill... the list goes on. But what I hope you understand is that those people are few and far between. Most humans are kind and understanding. Instead of worrying about those who look down at you, you need to realize that are an inspiration to so many. We don't feel sorry for you. We empathize with you, and you are so inspiring. Just as most of us could be homeless in the blink of an eye, most of us could be morbidly obese with the same blink. I was 75 pounds overweight (at 5' and 200 pounds, I was obese.) I lost 75 pounds, but have recently gained 25 back. Watching the Brookhaven episodes, and watching the emotional pain you are going through, has helped me regain my focus. I want to thank you for that. Reading your blog has also made me realize that I want to lose the weight so I can listen to music and hear the birds. I want to thank you for that, too. Just know, you're not an embarrassment, you're an inspiration. Please keep up the good work, know that you are loved, and be well.
Dear Mike
Bravo to whoever wrote the comment above me! You are an inspiration to so many of us and a hero to just as many.
Lydia CA
Hi Michael. So happy to have found you on the web and to have found this community of people who can help me fight the daily battle of addiction.
We all have to be responsible for our own behavior. Your wife could not have changed your addiction any more than she could have caused it. I thank God that she has been here because without her you would not be here to help all of us.
You are a rock star!!! And I know you are going to drive again if you aren't already. Come down here sometime. We drive on the beach. :)
Love,
Kathy in Florida
Hey Mike
My name is Sue and I too live in Florida where Kathy lives. Maybe we can all get together and enjoy that ride together.
Kathy good luck in your daily battle. I am in that same boat but I have to start thinking more like you Mike. Enjoying each day, smiling a bit, making it a little simple for myself and not to be so angry with every, including myself.
Well Mike I will be a regular and I will let you know how I am doing.
I hope Kathy does well, I hope we all do well.
Sue
I am watching an episode of Inside the Brookhaven Clinic, I'm sure its an old one. Richard Simmons appears in this and I am sorry it was such a bad experience for you. You are obviously a very caring, very special man. Good luck to you.
Mr. Hebranko,
I became "aquainted" with you through the Brookhaven show on Discovery. I came online to see if I could find out how some of the other Brookhaven patients have fared (there's a Brookhaven marathon on today). Is Tammy doing OK after her surgery? Is Dennis any better?
Anyway, these questions aren't why I posted to you - I posted because every time I saw you on the show, I was inspired and uplifted. Through pain, adversity, indiginity - whatever came your way - your spirit, faith and humor carried your though it. You are an inspiration to me, and you should be a role model to all. Not just for your determination to better your health, but in the way you live you life. You seem like a fun, warming, caring, loving person. It's obvious you and your wife have something special. You have friends who love you and care about you, and you return that tenfold.
I am glad I found your blog (I bookmarked it and will be looking in occasionally!) and I'm glad to hear things are going so well for you. Keep up the good work and keep the faith!
Love always, Leslie F.
Dear Mike
Saw your story recently on discovery. I have seen it before and I hope to see it again and again. Each time I get charged and now I have found your blog. You are truly an inspiration to us all. I love your relationship with your wife she is one great woman, I am sure you agree.
Good luck and God bless you
Frances Tn.
Hi Mike
I enjoy reading your story, not so much the pain you went through but rather how you actually got through it all. You can be an example for many and in many aspects of life. You have inspired me to try a lot harder.
I thank you
Dan S Va
My Dear Anonymous Friend,
Thank you for being so kind and trying to ease my pain. You made a difference.
I do have to share something with you, yes it is true, I do feel pain when I am being exploited as a "circus act" but the personal pain within myself I have learned to deal with and put in perspective.
The pain I feel is for those of my "Brothers and Sisters" who struggle every day with this disease. They have to deal with the inner physical and mental pain everyday and then whenever they have to deal with the public (and sometimes family and "friends"). They come across the "uneducated" and the out right cruel small section of the human race.
I feel for those of my friends that have not yet learned how to deal with it and not "eat" over it, not let it hurt on all kinds of levels, especially over other people's short comings.
You kindly remind me of the majority of people and their kindness. I know! I know well and have learned of many of these people and met so many sweet, kind, understanding people.
I would say the ratio of understanding and compassionate people to the hurtful people are 10,000 to 1. But unfortunately it is that "one" sometimes that hurts the most and hits dead center.
I have a theory about that and that is, it hurts so badly because we give those kind of people "the power" to hurt us!
Often the reason we give them this power is because we are usually "beating" oursleves up for what we wrongfully see as our failures!
If we practiced more self love, more self understanding and appreciated ourselves and our efforts over the years then we would not allow people to hurt us so much, especially when we are trying to help ourselves and stay positive along the way!
My kind friend on a personal note "Bravo" to you on two paths. First your initial weight loss and even more important than that I take my hat off to you on your new journey. Picking yourself up and dealing with that 25 pounds. Remember 25 is just a number, your attitude, lifestyle, inner peace and happiness is what will help the most.
I can tell by your concern for me that you are a special person, just don't you ever forget that!!!!
Good luck to you and please keep in touch
Love
MIke
Thanks for posting and the sweet things you had to say! Although I do not see myself as an inspiration, I personally feel we all learn and inspire each other, I do realize that this blog is getting a lot of recognition. Not only is it my postings that are touching some often it is what others are posting and sharing that is getting many to return and comment to me either publicly on the blog or privately to me via email.
So Lydia, I hope all is well with you and please continue to be a returnee to the blog. We would love to hear from you and good luck to you and take a minute and just smile!
Love
Mike
Dear Kathy
Welcome to our community and I personally am glad that you have found me and this blog site. I hope in the future that we can in some way (even a small way) help you with your "life long, life important" battle! Kathy I am sure you know it is not an easy time ahead but it is not an impossible task either!
Good luck to you Kathy, you have a new friend in your corner and that person is me! Also thanks for your kind thoughts and true words when it comes to my wife. She (Madelaine) is well aware now (after many years) that she is not responsible for my addiction. As you say we are all responsible for our own behavior.
The truth is we do not need anyone or anywhere to place blame on. If that was so then too many times we would say "oh it is not my fault, therefore I might as well eat"....
NO it is not about blame or fault, it is what it is.
We have a problem (I believe it is a disease, an addiction), and blame has nothing to do with getting well. Responsibility is important in recovery, As long as I am responsible then I have the power to make the changes!
Kathy, you will be fine just take your time, be patient with yourself, do the right things and be self forgiving and practice a little self love.
As for me being a "Rock Star" I love to sing but cannot carry a tune, I wish I could play an instrument! The best part in my eyes about being a "rock star' is that I could be wearing those "hip hugger" jeans with the thick garrison belt and the 28 inch waist! Ha@! me and Mick Jagger!
Thanks for the minute of my personal fantasy and you certainly got me smiling!
Keep in touch Kathy
Love
Mike
Hi Sue
It is so nice to hear from you, and I hope someday I will be driving on that beach and we can all have a great time, all of us together!
My journey so far has been interesting and I have learned so much about myself, and others.
I know that Kathy, you and I can all do well. It is not as easy as just saying it but that is the first step. We need to admit we have a problem and then and only then can we start our journey to recovery.
Inner peace, better healthy, and more quality in our lives is there for us! We need to take control of our lives and rather than be the victims we need to be the players, the makers, the ones who take control (a healthy control) of our life!
Sue you be well and keep in touch
all my Love
MIke
Ah Nancy
Thanks for your understanding, and concern. The experience came through the editors cuts a lot worse than it actually was. I have written what I was feeling that day. My concern was more for my wife and the truth was that she was okay also.
It is just a great example of what people who suffer from obesity not only goes through physically but emotionally it could get a little rough too.
We need to be strong and stay focused on getting well!
Thanks for your good wishes and right back at you Nancy, I hope all is well in your life and that you are doing well
Love
Mike
My dear Leslie
First, as for Tammy, the last thing I herd was that she went back to her home state (hopefully with her daughter). Tammy was a real nice young lady and like many of us suffered with this eating disorder to a near dangerous level. I heard she is doing well (thank God) and I pray that she has a happy and healthy life...she deserves it!
As for my friend Dennis, The truth is, I do not know. I am ashamed to say. We were in a hospital together and in Brookhaven for three years together and I tried real hard to get close to him. He was very respectful of me but there was an age difference and I guess our relationship was not what it could have been. Yet a day does not go by that I do not think or pray for Dennis, he is a nice young man who really wants to live!
To date I have not heard anything about Dennis (sometimes no news is good news) but I will try to find out how he is.
As for me my dear Leslie, I feel that my struggles (I like to call it my path) that I have come through is all part of the greater plan. It has made me who I am today. I know that I am "Hungry for Life", I love life and I want to live and not just exist.
I am lucky (probably the luckiest) man alive, I have the greatest wife, Son, Daughter in law, friends and family. Then I get to connect with beautiful people like you.
Oh, stupid me I forgot the best thing that has happened to me in 30 years. I thought that 30 years ago my son was the greatest gift God could have given me....and it was. Then all of a sudden God said, "Mike, oh Mike, I have another gift for you" and he gave me my grandson. Oh every struggle, every pain, every tear, is worth it when I hold that little boy on my lap and he says to me Ga Ga (he calls me ga ga)he says Ga Ga I love you.....and then takes his little hand and then will mess up my hair and he gets hysterical laughing. What is better, (no pizza, no sandwich, no ice cream,) nothing taste as good as that feels!
Leslie I hope to hear from you in the future and welcome to our blog family. Good luck to you and keep in touch
Love
Mike
Dear Frances
You are right I do agree with you, My wife is great and we have a great relationship! Oh we don't see eye to eye on every subject (on any subject) no but we laugh, and we enjoy each others company. She is my best friend, confidant and I respect her opinion, her mind and she is my hero!
Frances keep in touch
Good Luck
Love
Mike
Dear Dan
I want to wish you all the luck in the world and just remember ...."never give up"!
Thank you for your kind words and let's keep in touch
Mike
Dear Mike
You are so right and I will try to follow what you say. Thank you for your time and understanding. You are an unusual human being, I am so glad I have come across your blog.
Sue
I am so happy for you Mike, for the dreams that you have had come true. I cannot begin to tell you in words how much help you are to me and to countless others. There is a saying I heard that says "This thing we can failure is not the falling down but the staying down." If we fall 10 times, the only thing we need is to get up 11 times. I am getting back up again today, and you have given me a leg-up.
Kathy in Florida
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